About me

"I write a blog filled to the RIM of usually offensive, observational satire. But don't worry, its FUN! Thank you to the city of San Antonio Texas where i call home. The complete lack of anything normal gives me a reason to get on here and jot down my experiences. Thanks to Roland, my boyfriend who i love so ridiculously much that i feel the need to take a jab at him every now and again. (hes a good sport) Thank you to camera phones...u really are the single greatest invention ever. And to my friends and family. Love u guys, thanks for supporting my quirky ways and thinking I'm funny, even when i don't think i am."Read more

Robert Downey Jr. Makes me scr...

Robert Downey Jr. Makes me scream like a girl. Featured Work

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ooOoooh Eeeeee owwww

September 2nd, 2010 by Crystal@Pshhaww.net received No Comments »

JerryStiller serenity now serenity now serenity now serenity now serenity now serenity now serenity now serenity now serenity now serenity now serenity now serenity now serenity now serenity now serenity now serenity now serenity now serenity now serenity now serenity now serenity now serenity now serenity now serenity now serenity now serenity now serenity now serenity now serenity now serenity now serenity now serenity now serenity now serenity now serenity now serenity now serenity now serenity now serenity now serenity now serenity now serenity now serenity now serenity now serenity now serenity now serenity now serenity now serenity now serenity now serenity now serenity now serenity now serenity now serenity now serenity now serenity now serenity now serenity now serenity now serenity now serenity now serenity now serenity now serenity now serenity now serenity now serenity now serenity now serenity now serenity now serenity now serenity now serenity now serenity now serenity now serenity now serenity now serenity now serenity now serenity now serenity now serenity now serenity now serenity now serenity now serenity now serenity now serenity now serenity now!!!!!!!

 

Ahhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh!

Now, I’m not one to take to my blog to complain about things that are mostly out of my control. I realize that complaining online via Blogs or twitter is annoying and if someone really wants to read about your complaints on life then well….they’re weird.

So I wont do that, I wont fill your ears with complaints about little things that are so little i should just forget about them right this very minute…so I will…I’m forgetting them right now…..l

…..

……..

Forgotten. :D

Time to get back to life and things.

August 22nd, 2010 by Crystal@Pshhaww.net received 2 Comments »

     At the end of the day life does move right along, at a annoyingly swift fuckin pace now doesn’t it.  It doesn’t even give you time to stop and smell the roses or whatever the hell kind of flower is around. In my case it would be “Smell” the cedar pollen that floats up my nose and into my eyes causing them to sear in pain like a thousand tiny toenails scratching the surface. (was that a little dramatic?) Maybe i said the toenail reference because my need to be cut in the worst way..

   Anyway today i embark on a adventure known as Tax Free Weekend clothes shopping with my father. While i like to spend time with my dad no doubt, its the shopping for clothes things I’m not really looking forward to considering well….trying on clothes makes me sweaty and depressed. ANDDDDDD i hate it. I tried to explain this to the man but he doesn’t listen to me. So hopefully i will get a starbucks out of it. :D

Please god, give me the strength hold back the need to strangle a fucking kid today because the place is going to be crawling with them…..

Hiatus for a bit.

July 13th, 2010 by Crystal@Pshhaww.net received No Comments »

Our Dog has died, my humor died with her. For the time being i will be writing at HER blog, http://www.pshhaww.net/Daphne

Feel free to stop by and say hi.

thedaphie

Explaining common law marriage to 12 year olds.

June 22nd, 2010 by Crystal@Pshhaww.net received 1 Comment »

pshhawwlogo2

      Somehow, This kid ended up on my Facebook friends list, i don’t normally have cat convos with 12 year olds. I’m almost positive he added me after I posted a In-Game picture of World Of Warcraft. (yea I’m kind of a nerd like that.) So today there was a patch that was released which caused the servers to be down for something like 15 hours. As you can imagine nerds all over America are having meltdowns. This little dude Included.

12yearoldsarefunny

I thought it was especially funny when he asked me if i lived the “Lonely life”  I’m like dude, you’re 12! What do you know about the “Lonely Life”?

Oh BTW, Don’t worry I didn’t scar the kid by leaving him thinking he was married to his mother or anything.

God Damn i love being Mexican!

June 12th, 2010 by Crystal@Pshhaww.net received No Comments »
My friend Rene’s Best friend Singing El Pastor She freaking gives me the effin CHILLS when she holds those notes.

         Mariachi music is really WIN. I want this chick to sing at ALL my birthdays and my funeral. (Cause believe it or not, the majority of Mexicans WANT Mariachi’s to play at their funerals—TOTALLY true, just ask one.)

Some people (my mother) have told me that when I refer to myself as “Mexican” that I am wrong. Well because, she says that I’m not really even Mexican at all because to be considered a “Mexican” your descendants would have to have come from Mexico, where as mine apparently were some kind of Indian that never even lived in Mexico.

………………BUT back then Texas was apart of Mexico so, fuck it. I’m still Mexican. :)

BTW, I have NO idea what she is saying. But it sounds GORGEOUS!

Merchandise for stalkers.

June 9th, 2010 by Crystal@Pshhaww.net received No Comments »

 

The Best Digital Camera Binoculars.

On this site that i was browsing through there is a section of what they call “The best” And everything that is apparently on this section is qualified as “The best”. So when i saw these, i thought to myself..”The BEST digital camera binoculars?” Meaning that there are OTHERS that aren’t the best? Because truly i have never heard of such a thing as these. Pretty creepy if you ask me. (Turns out, with a quick Google, there are TONS of digital camera binoculars, and even tripods for them, everyone should go buy some extremely heavy curtains RIGHT NOW!) What…..the EFF?

 

Then, i found these which are pretty cool.

Now, I’m not one who goes swimming in large bodies of water. But hey who wouldn’t want to take a AWESOME picture like this.

 

 

 original-shark-pic

With these digital camera goggles my friend…, YOU can!

 

SHOP Digital camera binoculars for your stalking needs!!

I Just wanted to say….

June 3rd, 2010 by Crystal@Pshhaww.net received 2 Comments »

steven 

HAPPY BIRTHDAY to my cousin STEVEN!! Growing up, i remember Steven playing Madonna day and night. I Grew to learn the “Dress you up in my loves” AND “Lucky Stars” .

I thank you Steven for showing me at such a young age what GOOD MUSIC was!!!!  I Love you and I Hope your birthday was as amazing as you are!!!

Scary storm just rolled threw.

June 2nd, 2010 by Crystal@Pshhaww.net received 1 Comment »

It was NO JOKE!

Kid get’s bit by some rabid fish in a lake s...

June 2nd, 2010 by Crystal@Pshhaww.net received No Comments »

jaws11

So, I have Expressed before about how I don’t like to swim in anything larger then a swimming pool or bathtub. I don’t like the ocean, I don’t like the lake, I don’t mind so much tubing in the river but it takes a lot for me to get out of my tube in water I cant see the bottom to.

I get the heebie jeebies swimming in the water with my character in World of Warcraft. 

You just never know what the hell is swimming around you. Apparently there is some serious Shit down there.

Case in Point…

Unknown Fish Attacks Child in Indiana Lake



Scottsburg, Indiana (WHAS11) – A 5-year-old girl was attacked by some type of unknown fish on Monday while swimming in a roped-off area at Hardy Lake in southern Indiana.

Some people in the area say this isn’t an isolated incident.
WHAS11’s Adam Walser was at Hardy Lake with more on this story.
5-year-old Loralye Daubaugh was doing okay on Tuesday.
On Monday, she was swimming in an area marked off by buoys in Hardy Lake when something bit her thigh.

“It felt like someone was pinching me,” said Loralye.
She wasn’t the only one who was bit.
Loralye and her grandmother ran to the concession stand for help, where they learned she wasn’t the first child attacked over the weekend.
They were told that a smaller child had also gotten bitten and her leg was also severely bruised.

The incidents now have people in the area wondering exactly what lies just below the water’s surface. People have speculated that it could be several different species of fish.
Fishermen speculated that it could be anything from a big carp, to a bowfin to a bass.
The staff believes it may have been a catfish guarding her nest.
And they expect the fish to head back out to deeper water once it’s young have hatched.
The park’s director says he expects the offending fish will most likely move on within the next few days.
 

—–They think it’s a bite from a fish called a “Brown Fish” or some crap. ^ That is it’s skull….

Psh…..

Science for teh WINZ!

June 1st, 2010 by Crystal@Pshhaww.net received No Comments »

This little man was able to hear his mothers voice for the FIRST time when his Cochlear implant was recently activated. It lights a little flame in my black heart. 

 

Try not to cry people at the amazingly cute smile!!

 

 

 

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